Have you ever thought about your self-relationship? What does even mean to have a good relationship with yourself?
Sad but true, many of us simply don’t allow ourselves to keep real and accept the person we really are. For some reason we prefer editing ourselves for others rather than being confident enough to believe that the true ‘we’ is good enough. Our confidence has to come from a good and healthy balance in our life and our own opinion about ourselves. It’s about healthy self-love.
Self-relationship values
First of all, you will need a set of values to support and keep your relationships. Let’s mention at least four of them that are of greatest importance. Generosity, insistence, intuition and the power of forgiveness.
- Generosity. Nowadays it is a real gift to give freely, just for a thank you. When you are generous to yourself, others tend to respond favorably to you. What you give other people always comes back to you in different ways.
- Insistence. It’s important to assert yourself and defend your opinion in your relationship with others. You are lucky if you you can allow others not to bring you down or take anything from you without a permission. If you know how to say ‘yes’ then you also should be confident enough to say ‘no’.
- Intuition. It is the ability to take a step back and appraise the situation whether your current relationships are meaningful to you or not. It is also the ability to choose the people who you want to see around you. Because if you have friends who constantly waste their lives, they might not be the best company for you. Learn to make a right choice and examine your relationships.
- Forgiveness. Sometimes forgiving others is more important to yourself than to others because it helps not to focus on negative thoughts. All you need to do is to analyze any situation, make conclusions and have no ill will.
Ways to have a healthy relationship with yourself
Learning to be in a healthy and balanced relationship with yourself doesn’t come in a night. An everyday practice is essential to start to change your mind and form a habit of self-love. Here are my tips for maintaining a healthy relationship with yourself.
Start listening to yourself
Try to be a good parent to yourself or a good friend, sometimes you need to be even a strict teacher. Just try to find that balance to feel comfortable with yourself – follow your thoughts, analyze them objectively. Try to avoid sharp emotions, learn to stay calm.
Care for your needs
Work, relationships with others, etc. – it is all good but first of all, don’t forget to care for your basic physical needs that include getting proper sleep and rest, eating nutrients and exercising. Be sure you understand the importance of what feeds your mind, body and spirit all together.
Be kind to yourself
Do not criticize yourself badly, it’s better to understand what you should do the next time to feel better about the result. The more you treat your body and mind with the goodness of heart it deserves, the more you will learn to love it over time and the more it will love you back.
Be gentle with yourself
As same as in relationships with others, never be angry at yourself, never use harmful and mean words to yourself. If you’re not satisfied with something, just say to yourself that “It’s gonna be fine, we’ll find the way.”
Accept yourself
Be sure that you accept yourself as you really are at this moment. Even if you want to change something, you should start by accepting how you are now to have an ability to go on and work more.
Criticize fair enough
It’s good if you can criticize yourself and take the gauge of your abilities in an adequate way. Don’t be too strict and don’t be too tender. Find a balance to become the best version of yourself.
Daily habits practice
All you need to remember that self-love is an action, not just a feeling. Daily practice of little habits can bring about a positive change to improve the relationship you have with yourself and lead you to a healthy and balanced self-love in general.
- Invest in yourself. Spend at least 30 minutes each day doing something that cheers you up. By the way, 30 minutes is not that many. You can spend this time for your morning skin care rituals or just take a break and walk.
- If you feel like you have failed, don’t beat yourself up. Act like you are your best friend: be kind and supportive.
- Take a few minutes each day to appreciate yourself.
Self-relationship is the first and the most important thing that you can bring up if you want to improve all your outer relationships. It is about being the best friend to yourself. It is who you really are and how you interact with the world and the others.
Balance it and remember, whatever you do, you do it for yourself!


