When I was 17, I was diagnosed with psoriasis, and it completely changed the way I saw myself. I am sure many of us know that feeling when you look in the mirror and cannot stand what you see. For me, that feeling became a part of my daily reality. Nearly seventy percent of my body was covered with wounds, and I felt trapped in a body I no longer recognized. Every morning I woke up wishing I could escape my own skin and stop fighting this constant battle with myself.

Summer was the most painful season. At seventeen, you dream about wearing a light dress, going to the beach, feeling carefree. I couldn’t do any of that. After several attempts to go out and facing people’s confused or judgmental looks, something inside me shut down. I felt unbearable shame, as if I needed to hide from the world. People did not understand what psoriasis was, and sometimes I felt they stepped back from me, afraid they might catch it. It wasn’t the worst thing that could happen to someone, but at that age and in that emotional state, it felt like an invisible weight I carried everywhere.

I spent years searching for something that would cure it, although I didn’t have many options back then. Eventually I learned that this kind of condition doesn’t disappear forever; you simply reach periods of remission. Accepting that was another challenge. It meant learning to accept that this was a part of me, and at that time I wasn’t ready.

Around that period, beauty pageants unexpectedly appeared in my life. I had never dreamed of being a model or stepping onto a stage. I couldn’t imagine doing any of that with the way my body looked. Maybe my face was fine, but my body felt damaged, and I couldn’t picture myself standing under bright lights. Agencies and even my university invited me to participate, but I always declined, pretending it didn’t interest me while secretly wishing I could be brave enough to walk on a runway with clear skin and confidence.

Time passed, and slowly I started to find more acceptance within myself. I stopped all treatments and shifted my focus toward healing emotionally. I tried to rebuild my confidence, to reconnect with the parts of myself I had pushed away. And then something unexpected happened: my skin began to heal. Not fully, and not instantly, but gradually. I still have scars even today, but most of the wounds faded. For the first time in years, I felt relief. I could look in the mirror without feeling broken.

You know what happened after that. I decided to give pageants and modeling a chance. A good tan and some makeup helped conceal what remained, but what mattered most was that I finally felt ready. That moment was my first real step toward understanding the importance of self-love. It taught me that no matter what you look like, no matter how you feel about your body, you should never hate it. There is always a reason your body looks the way it does. Even if you want to change something, the first step is to embrace who you are right now.

This journey taught me that acceptance is not something you reach overnight. It’s something you grow into, little by little, with patience and honesty. And once you start seeing yourself with compassion, everything begins to change.